Mitch Has Micropenis

July 26, 2011 § Leave a comment


Mitch has micropenis.  There are a lot of other things about him worthy of note, but for now, let me just state this again: Mitch has micropenis.  The person with micropenis is to a man, like, if you lived in a small town in 1984 during the height of child molestation and satanic ritual abuse hysteria, and there was a kid who actually got kidnapped in a van and sexually abused—if you knew this kid, or knew someone who knew this kid, he became a whispered legend who touched off some deep horror that felt like fingers tickling around your spine. To hear about an actual person with micropenis.  To see a woman actually crook her thumb to give you a visual aid about the size of this man’s penis, bending it at a 90 degree angle to make very clear that it was not the length and girth of her entire thumb in its fully erect state, just the second digit.  Mitch has micropenis.  He is a complex character in many ways but in my mind no nuance of his being will be attributed to anything but his micropenis.

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